Angels and Demons and Sailors

I like makeup. You could call it one of my serious concerns. I wrote a passionate entry on eyeliner a few years ago -  over five years ago, actually (!). I'm happy to report that I can spend more money on make up now than I could then...but that doesn't mean that I do.

That much.

I am still a practical-minded kinda lady from day to day - but when I decide I finally like something, I try to get the best version possible and do it right. With the exception of mascara, the higher end make up products perform better and last longer, so the few extra beans are worth it to me.

My latest quest is Hello Sailor by Lipstick Queen. I read about it somewhere on the 'nets...Pinterest maybe? I can't remember. Anyway, I filed it away and recently remembered that I wanted to try it. The gimmick unique property about Hello Sailor is that the product is blue, but it doesn't go on that way. Instead, it's supposed to give you a customized berry finish that suits your individual complexion (uh...hence customized - I was just being clear). I like berry finishes. Lipsticks with bluish undertones also make your teeth appear whiter. Let's do this, right?

It continues to be a quest, as I can't get my hands on it very easily - because per usual, I'm just very on trend. That's gotta be it, right?
I also have to test it before buying...if you've ever spent more than a few bucks on a lipstick, only to be disappointed, you know how important this is. And did I mention I live pretty deep in the Catskills? Like eleventy billion miles from everything? This means that I have to seize the opportunities when they present.

I was in Albany recently - Sephora does not carry it. Well poop. I should have checked ahead. I didn't have time to make further stops that day. A few days ago, I was in Binghamton. I'd researched ahead this time and saw that Ulta carries it - well hooray! I walked in and asked the associate right at the door about it (no need to wander the sparkling aisles of tiny, colorful bottles and pots and potions and wonder if glitter is work appropriate now that it's 2014).

She gave me the blankest, most confused and at the same time defeated look and repeated my question, "Hello...hello...Suh...Sailor?"

Did I fucking stutter?

"Yes. Hello Sailor, by Lipstick Queen? Do you have it?"

"Um. No."

OMG I am so sad now. I'm crushed. I almost whined, "But it says you have it online!?" You are useless to me.

"Um. Well. Some of our top stores carry things before we do...maybe it's a newer item?"

Remember I said how on trend I am? Evidence, folks. Right there.^

Someone overheard our chat. "Oh, Hello Sailor, yes... I know it..." said a voice from behind the counter. I turned around and it was Alicia Keyes. It wasn't Alicia Keyes. But she really looked like her and I wanted to be her BFF right there, or maybe make out with her. This is the level of pretty we are talking. She wore golden glitter on her perfect eyelids and perfect lashes. Possibly she was an angel. Oh, come through for me Angel Alicia...

But Angel Alicia had nothing but sad news for me. They just don't have it right now. Nodding and holding my arm, she walked me over to a gloss with a sheer blue sparkly tint, hoping it could appease me, but when our eyes met, she knew the deal. She looked inside my cosmetic soul, and understood that nothing but Hello Sailor would do.

She told me I could order it from their online store, but appreciated that I wanted to test it first. And, while I didn't bore Angel Alicia with this concern, I don't like ordering make up in the summer months because I worry about it melting in a hot delivery truck.

As I walked out, I remembered that Sally Beauty Supply (I hate that place) was just a little bit further down the street...another shot! I practically ran in and jumped on the counter.

"No. I never heard of it."

Ugh! She was mean, too.  Like if she hadn't heard of it, it must not exist. She was most definitely not an angel. She was a demon. A demon in teal shadow and matching push up bra busting out of her T-shirt. I needed Alicia back.

My last try that evening was at Boscov's. I figured they wouldn't have it, and I was right.

Here we are now, a week into my quest. I can order it online and take a chance without testing, but it really bugs me to do that. What do you think? I'm calling on all my makeup fans out there. Have you tried it or tested it? Where? I really want to say Hello to this Sailor! Help me get him!